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Bunk Bio Edition

Page 2

LAKITU:
(Mario series)
Full Name: Lakitu Koopa

Race: Koopa

Gender: Male

Age: 27

Birthdate: January 6, 1973

Aliases: Spiniac, Fisherman, Lakitutuhead, Scaredykoopa

Games Appeared in: Super Mario Bros., Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Mario World, SMW2: Yoshi's Island, Super Mario Kart, Mario Kart 64, Super Mario 64, Tetris Attack, Super Mario RPG, Paper Mario

Favourite Food: Spiny Eggs

Apparel: red wristbands, a green shell, and a cloud cover

Marital Status: Single

Normal Status: Alive

Role in Life: Spiny-thrower, Mario-disturber, cloud-floater

Relation to Mario: Constantly throws Spiny eggs at Mario

Favorite Quote: "Hey, these eggs hurt, right?"

Hidden Shames: Has chubby hands

Basic Facts:
- floats on a cloud
- throws Spiny eggs at Mario

Life Story: Baby Lakitu Koopa was born with chubby fingers. Now I know you're asking, "What does THAT have to do with the story?" Well, it explains a lot. His mother and father took care of him very well, and treated him like any normal Koopa Troopa should be treated. Life was simple.

However, school was not. The young Lakitu was teased by all the other Koopa Troopas because he had chubby fingers. And he just couldn't get work done due to his chubby fingers. He couldn't fit a pencil into his hand! So Lakitu dropped out of school quickly, and sat on the couch, watching TV and flipping through the phone book for other schools. Suddenly, he found a big ad for an interesting school that sounded right for him. The school was Bowser's Koopa Training School.

Lakitu enrolled in Bowser's school, and met Bowser himself. A gruff sort he was. "Lakitu," Bowser growled. "I'm not gonna go easy on you. You're gonna train hard! And you're gonna train fast! And when I'm through with ya, you're gonna be part of the Koopa Troop! You got that?" Lakitu shakily agreed, and they started on the training.

After 6 months of hard cold training, the Koopa Troop was finally ready to do battle with a seedy plumber named Mario. However, after Lakitu heard what they were going to do to this 'Mario', he felt unsteady about this Koopa Troop idea. But it was too late now. He must finish the job.

Lakitu was called to Cloud Duty. His job was to float in a cloud, and shoot Spiny Eggs at Mario. However, he gladly refused, and didn't want to shoot them at the poor plumber. "Why?" Lakitu asked Bowser. "Why must I kill a total stranger?" Bowser turned a shoulder and replied, "He's deadly." So Lakitu hopped into the newest model of sky transportation, Jugem's cloud, and floated over to where Mario was.

Lakitu was ready to shoot the eggs, when he realized how hungry he was. So, instead of shooting the eggs, he tried to EAT them!!! However, with his chubby fingers, he kept dropping the eggs onto the ground below (see, there's a reason for everything!!!). And Mario was unluckily nearby. That began his career of Mario 'attacks'.

Currently, he works in many forms, such as a Mario attacker, or a Kart Race Referee. In any case, he's the Lakitu that took it all.


MALLOW:
(Super Mario RPG)
Full Name: Mallow Marshel Nimbus

Race: Nimbuslian

Gender: Male

Age: 16

Birthdate: November 25, 1984

Aliases: Marshmallow, Puffball, Chewy-Dewey, Fluff, Tadpolio

Games Appeared in: Super Mario RPG

Favourite Food: Mushrooms

Apparel: blue-and-white striped pants, brown belt, pink shoes

Marital Status: Met Princess Nimbi, and got married April 2000

Normal Status: Alive

Role in Life: Nimbus Land-ruler, throne-heir, star-retriever

Favorite Quote: "That's him! He took it!"

Hidden Shames: Can't jump, occasionally goes stale, cries a lot (A LOT!!!)

Basic Facts:
- prince of Nimbus Land
- Mario's friend
- is a crybaby
- helped Mario on his quest for the seven stars

Life Story: Mallow was born in the Nimbus Land hospital, to the King and Queen Nimbus. The parents were overjoyed when they saw Mallow's cute little face in the nursery window. However, a year or two later, the King and Queen struck financial problems within the Kingdom, and could not support their son. While asleep, they set him in a basket, and sent him down the Midas River.

That morning, he was floating near Tadpole Pond, near the wise Frogfucius' Island. While eating a Cricket Pie, he saw the young bundle of puff in the basket. Frogfucius scooped him up from the water, and set him on the ground. Attached to the baby's basket was a note. It read:

Please take care of sweet little Mallow. Someday, we hope he returns to us. -Sorry One

Frogfucius raised Mallow with his own knowledge. He implanted a thought in Mallow's mind that he was a tadpole. As Mallow grew older, Frogfucius realized that this puffball knew powerful magic. The old frog had raised a powerful child, and who knew what Mallow's magic could be used for.

Meanwhile, King and Queen Nimbus sorted out their financial differences. However, Mallow was nowhere to be found. They thought they had lost their child... ...FOREVER...

While getting a Cricket Pie in Mushroom Kingdom for Frogfucius, a large purple crocodile named Croco stole the Frog Coin he would buy it with. When he chased him, Mallow realized he couldn't jump, like the other tadpoles. At the same time, Mario was in the Mushroom Kingdom, discussing the huge sword, which had crashed into Bowser's Keep.... oh, anyway, Mario found the crying Mallow, and agreed to help him on his quest. To retrieve the Frog Coin.

Mallow took Mario to meet his 'grandfather', Frogfucius. However, upon this visit, he found two things: he was NOT a tadpole, AND he must accompany Mario on his long quest, for in time, he would find his real parents again. And so he did. He is currently Prince Mallow, of Nimbus Land. His parents are pleased, and once again, Mallow stands proud.


MARIO: Full Name: Mario Fettocheeni Mario

Race: Human

Gender: Male

Age: 41 (although he refuses to truly reveal it, this is an estimate)

Birthdate: August 28, 19??

Aliases: Mustachioed One, Ravioli-Breath, Luigi, Mr. Ouagadougou, Shorty, Doc

Games Appeared in: Let's start from the top... (deep breath) Mario Bros., Super Mario Bros., Super Mario Bros. 2, Super Mario Bros. 3, Super Mario Land, Super Mario World, Super Mario Land 2: 6 Golden Coins, Dr. Mario, Super Mario 64, Super Mario Kart, Mario Kart 64, Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island, Donkey Kong, Donkey Kong Jr., Tennis, Golf, Wrecking Crew, Punch-Out!!! Yoshi, Yoshi's Cookie, Donkey Kong Classics, NES Open Tournament 1991, Qix, Tetris {Game Boy version}, Pinball, Alleyway, F-1 Race, Mario Party, Super Smash Bros., Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, Mario Clash, Kirby Super Star, Super Mario Bros. DX, Mario Party 2, Donkey Kong Country 2, Mario Is Missing, Mario's Time Machine, Super Mario All-Stars, Mario Golf, Mario Tennis, Mario Party 3, Paper Mario, Super Mario Advance

Favourite Food: Spaghetti (he's always had a soft spot for Italian pasta)

Apparel: blue overalls, red shirt, brown Koopa-stompin' boots, red cap with "M" on it

Marital Status: Uh, didn't he get married to Princess Toadstool a few times?

Normal Status: Alive (and dead many, many times)

Role in Life: Princess saver, Goomba-stomper, pasta-muncher

Favorite Quote: "It's-a me, Mario!"

Hidden Shames: Gets extreme hat-head under the cap, occasionally pulls leg muscles when riding Yoshi

Basic Facts:
- brother of Luigi
- the best video game star ever
- pasta-loving, princess-loving, P-Wing-loving guy
- friends to Yoshi, Toad, and Princess
- is against Wario, Bowser, Kamek, and the ever-loving Goomba

Life Story: Once upon a time in a land far away, there was mother and father, waiting for their two bundles of joy to be brought to them by stork. However, when the stork was in the middle of his journey, Kamek, the evil MagiKoopa, flew towards him and snatched one of the babies, and took off into the dimly lit distance. Then, the stork accidentally dropped the other baby down, down towards the sea. However, he was saved by Yoshi when the baby landed on Yoshi's back. Over many, many areas did the duo of the baby and Yoshi travel, until they met up with a baby known as 'Bowser', and then Yoshi killed Kamek, and retrieved the other baby. Afterwards, the babies were taken home and named Mario and Luigi.

Mario wanted to grow up like this father, and become an airplane pilot. However, he didn't make it into pilot school (it was all booked up with Mushroom people, I guess). So, he went into the art of carpentry. When he was 20, he lived a short-term commitment as a carpenter. However, soon afterwards, he was fired for accidentally hitting the boss with a hammer while he was practicing for "Donkey Kong". So Mario took up plumbing when he was 22, and from then on a plumber he'd be. His faithful brother, Luigi, also took on the plumbing business. You could not count how many toilets Mario had unclogged by the time he was in his later 20s. (although an estimate is 13,790). However, soon plungers were selling like hotcakes, and plumbing business was slow, so they moved to Brooklyn, where business suddenly went up, like 400%! So they stayed in an apartment in Brooklyn, until this very day.

Oh, don't leave yet. There's still more. Anyway, one day, they were called to an unusual job - sewer work. It seemed that one of the pipes was not producing any water, and they needed some plumbers to fix this problem. So the city called the Orville Bros. But because THEY were too busy, they chose Mario and Luigi. When the Bros. arrived to check this out, they got sucked into the pipe. When they found themselves at the other end, Mario looked up to see a huge ape (Donkey Kong). When he looked at Luigi, he saw nothing but air. Luigi had vanished. DK pointed to a princess on top of a metal beam, and then threw Mario into a pile of trash cans. So he saved this damsel, and kick some monkey butt. However, he went on and on and on (and on), from Super Mario Bros., to Super Mario 64, and never left this world. He is presently at Mario's Pad, in the miraculous world of Super Mario RPG, teeing it off on the golf course with his buddies.

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