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Meow Mix
Chocolove Coffee Crunch
// article by Meow

Along my travels, I had a strong hankerin' for some chocolate. So I swooped by a store and decided to dive into the organic and natural food aisle since I was curious if there were any sweetened with stevia, and this little beauty caught my eye.

Coffee is about my favorite thing I can't eat too much of because I'm an old man with anxiety, so of course I'll try a chocolate with some in it. Whilst looking the thing over, I noticed on the back of the package that it has a "Love Poem Inside".

I needed to see this.

Opening the brown packaging, there's a generic golden wrapping concealing a bar of dark chocolate with little rounded mounds emblazoned with little hearts. The brown packaging itself has a cheesy poem written on it, with a strange attempt at rhyming in an alternating pattern (i.e. I like pie, it is cool. I'm a guy, not a fool) that doesn't really work too well in actually reading it aloud due to the rhymes ...really not making sense ("Where does the fault lie? What the core" and yes, no punctuation; I'm not sure if it's the start or its own thing). Maybe I'm just not with-it with poem writing. I give the writing a 2/10.

Back to the real reason I got this thing, the chocolate itself is pretty nice. Not too sweet, not overly bitter, even with the pieces of coarsely ground coffee beans. It's just sweet enough to balance all the flavoring out, leading to a delightful and crunchy experience with a nice aftertaste of coffee left in your mouth. All that said, it's pretty standard chocolate. At least, for non-cheaply made chocolate. I wouldn't buy this or another kind of Chocolove again outside of a sale (like it was when I got this), rather opting for a Ritter Sport for this tier of chocolate and price. But if I ever get a girlfriend someday, maybe I'll snag a bar to woo her with cheesy factory-printed poems written by some weirdo I've never met. Because romance.


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